LEON KOMPOWSKY!!!!!!
Look and sound familier?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
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Another joke
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Why can't I do that?
When you're fighting and other Star Fox members come one to the screen, they can go totally vertical while flying but you can't! That's not cool! That's stinx!
In Sector Y Peppy says for for to shoot little
bug things down.
Afterwards, you should either hear:
Falco: "Fox! You're suppous to shot them all!"
OR
Peppy: "Good job. Keep up the good work!"
I always shoot all of them down and get a gold
ring and I hear Falco!
(I'm gonna change my name cause I hate him . . . someone better shoot
HIM down.)
Thank you for listening.
Check this out. When you go to Sector Y
in one part Slippy says,
"Something's wrong. I don't see anything." BUT I SEE SOMETHING! One
of
those flying knights or whatever!
When you go to Solar, Slippy says, "It's too hot! I can't
take it
anymore!" WELL DUH! HE CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE BECAUSE HE FLEW RIGHT
BY
THE LAVA!
When you beat that missle level, he says, "Don't worry.
Slippy's
here!" Shut up Slippy! StarFox never needed his help, and we worry
because he exsists!
Thank you for listening.
-Katt Monroe
Star feces: the intergalactic mr hankey, he is a cheerful
peice of shit
who likes to sing barney type songs.
Star cadaver: fianly a character more lifeless than
fox, he just sits
there like a good little corpse, he is dead after all,
p.s. fox is one sick perv, not only does he cross dress,
but he is
dating his cosine, what next, is he going to date star?
and you suceed
you send in starfox humor and get mixed up with Men
in Black because
your brain is warped
your still working on the same starfox humor for 3 months
everytime you beat starfox instead of saying "The End"
it says "we cant
take it anymore!"
then it says "turn the game off!"
then it begins to bribe you with a few thousand dollars
and you refuse
then the game blows up
your have 35 melted starfox games from overheating
you juice up your rumble pack and it causes a 9.0
you juice up your rumble pack and you blow california away
you juice up your rumble pack and becom the first person on mars
you hack into foxs crew and create a humor section about
juicing up your
rumble pack (heehee) *Editor's Note: About that humor
section....
you think wolf odonnel deserves something good since
he went through a
hard life
you point out things about wolf odonnel like his cut
ear and peter pan
cap, like me (check out my message on the message
board under Wild Wolf)
you send in starfox humor and tell people to go ti the
message board and
check out your stuff
wolf pokes his other eye out and throws it at you when
your playing the
game
you shoot katt down in the game and she says "i could
kiss you for
that!" before she explodes into a million pieces
Falco decides not to go on a mission because hes tired
you walk in school/workplace/etc with an N64 controller
locked in your
hands
you tell andross of the milky way and in turn he gives
you control of
your school/work place/etc
everyone in the game shoots you and general pepper sends
a fleet out to
get you
and you beat them all
you think the lylat system is real
you then try to travel to the lylat system
and you suceed
you beat andross and corneria
you become andross
you come back to the milky way and announce that nintendo
make a sequel
to starfox or youll blow up Earth
you say in a weird language "hand over the galaxy or
else earth will be
destroyed"
you destroy earth
your starfox humor sidetracks twice on Men in Black
5.KILL THAT PIECE OF CRAP FALCO
"ow! watch where your shooting pigfucker"
"oh my god! they killed slippy!"
Bartender: He went to the phone booth to find Katt's
phone number. He
said it was a favor for Falco.
Senior Girl: At my prom, he said I was wearing a beautifl
dress and then
asked why I STOLE it from Fox McCloud's mother.
Some Dude: What's Star Fox 64???? I only did this
to get on TV...
There you have it. If you see this PsychoRaph please
call the police. I
hope their number's still 911...
what if fox mccloud decides he is gay and makes a show called "fox" that is a virtual clone of "ellen"
what if one of the worlds in starfox 64 were "spice world" and the boss were the spice girls
what if starfox 64 had a plot and dialogue that didnt
make the dialogue in resident evil sound like shakespear
Fox McCloud: On Earth sueing the U.S. Air Force because there is no place to fit Fox's tail in an Earth jet.
Slippy: Being chace in his arwing constantly (as usual)
Falco: He is now a stand up comedian using his attitude to get money to pay his rent.
Peppy: Eating a carrot...
Q.How many slippy's dose it take to change a light bolb?
A.2,one to change the bulb,the other to get chassed by bad guys.
Q.Whay do bad guys chass Slippy all the time?
A.They think slippy has Katt's phone number.
Q.Why did Pigma betray Star Fox & joined Andross?
A.Star Fox didn't pay well.
Q.Why did the Swat Kats sue falco?
A.He said "crud".
Q.Why did Cloud Strife in FF7 sue Fox McCloud?
A.Take a wild quess.
Q.Did Andross have a normal job before he turned evil?
A.Yes,a janitor "Those tin cans are no match for me."
Q.What do you call Star Fox with a internet gaming option?
A.Better then Quake.
Q.What dose Star Fox & drugs have in common?
A.don't know but I'm doped on both.
What if Star Wolf got his own game?
What if the Swat Kats became quest stars in Star Fox 64.
What if Star Wolf stole the Turbo Kat from the Swat Kats & used it against Star Fox?
What if Star Fox go there own Manga cartoon.
What if Falco & Katt got married & had a half cat, half bird freak for a kid?
What if Falco & Katt got married & there first
baby looked like Fox McCloud?
2) You watch 101 Dalmatians to see if you could find Roverans.**
3) You think Natlarn Berola is a member of the Justice Supreme Court.***
4) You try to E-Mail Joíhara Prather about an offer of free eye surgery.***
5) When someone comes up to you with a table saw as a gift, you could have sworn that this person is a best friend of Leon Powalski.*
6) You are the first female ace pilot for a country and you have migraines.****
(You MUST read my fanfic stories in order
for you to understand these jokes. Marked are the stories that
connect to the joke: *--Wolfís Destiny, **--Billís War,
***--Natlarnís Influence, ****--Of Snow Leopards and Leon)
...you turn the game on and it says, "If I go through
this ONE MORE
TIME, I'll shoot myself!"
...you start yelling at falcons because Falco has a bad temper.
...you go hunting for Apes.
...you shoot every wolf you see and give it cybernetic implants.
...you play the first stage of 'Tomb Raider' over and over again just to shoot the wolves.
... every time you hear a first grader talk, you turn around to see if it was Slippy.
...you buy a Toad and keep telling it, "Shut up and go thru puberty!"
...you buy a bird and teach it to say, "I guess I should be thankful."
...you kill cameilions for fun.
...you have every article on Star Fox up on your walls.
...you write love letters to Katt.
...she answers you (see above).
...you go to see a jet plane's cockpitt and wonder where the tail fits.
...you go buy a bulldog and see how well he can play on Katina.
...you're Slippy's biggest fan.
...you warship Fox McCloud.
...you claim to be James McCloud to get on the team.
...you accidently dress up as Pigma instead (see above).
...you buy 'Diddy Kong Racing' just to try and kill Diddy.
...you buy the old 'Donkey Kong' game (featuring Mario) just to try and kill Donkey Kong.
...you try to make up 'too much Star Fox 64' jokes.
...you succeeed and turn into a psycho(see above).
...you yell at the T.V. screen when Andross talks, "I'll have my revenge! I'll avenge my father!"
...your parents tell you to seek counseling because of your exessive playing.
...you make strategies for Titania and Solar on the 'Medals, Tips and Secrets' page.
...Nintendo agrees to put you as a character in a 'Star Fox 64' sequel.
...You tinker with your car so it will go into 'all range mode'.
...you shoot Slippy to get him out of your hair.
...you shoot Peppy to get him out of the way.
...you know how to play as Falco in training.
...you sign a contract to make Star Fox action figures.
...you appear in a Star Fox holiday special.
...you convince the people of 'Wheaties' cerial to put Fox McCloud on the front of the box.
...you know how to play as Bill in vs. mode.
...you know how to play as Wolf.
...you know how to trigger the 'Debug' mode.
...you find a warp on Venom.
...you win a humor award and put it as wallpaper on your Windows desktop.
...in a jet plane, you lose your wings and can still fly.
...you trigger a warp after you enter the air force.
...you convince NASA to build 'Great Fox'.
...you own Great Fox.
...ROB 64 becomes your favorite character.
...you try to make the original Star Fox compatable
with your N64.
1) I Didnít Do It; Pigmaís Fault
2) Apes of Wrath
3) Of Snow Leopards and Leon (read my fanfic....pretty please?)
4) Billís Guide to Avoiding Torture
5) Why Justice is Important, by Natlarn Berola
6) Leonís Make-Your-Own Palm-Sized Table Saw Guide
7) 1,001 Ways to Hate Wolf OíDonnell, by Andross
8) Young Forever, by Slippy Toad (no wonder he couldnít escape puberty...)
9) The Benefits of Being Old, by Peppy Hare
10) Why Andross is a Back-Stabber, by Buck (Natlarnís Influence fanfic) *You must read Jwolfman's Fanfic to get these jokes
Pepy harasses you
You notice Falco's ship is empty and Katt's ship is shakeing and you here "OH yeah! GO FALCO! UH!UH!
You notice how star fox takes off a "clumb" before he starts to drive his landmaster
Wolf steals your landmaster
and blows up your house cause with the landmaster you keep shooting him down
You hear Slippy say "Fox, I dont feel so good"
You hear Bill go "You still owe me 25 cents"
You hear James McLoud say "I cánt see in these damn sun glasses!!!"
You get sued by Star wolf for breaking his human rights
You lose and get sent to a jail on Venom
Falco "acidentally" shoots a bomb on your jail in a atemp to break you out
but instead he burns you to death
A stuerdess comes and puts Fox's seat in the upright postion
You earn A LOT of frequent flyer miles
Before going to the next misson you hear Slippy say
the ticket is to expensive! I cant afford it!
You here Pepy the most experinced pilot go Let's see I guess this one is brake and this one is
Star Wolf adjects out of his ship right before you shoot his plane down
And he shoots you down with a hand grenade
You hear the Star Wars theme song
You see Will Smith flying one of Bill's ships on Katina
Right before dying Wolf gives you a middle finger
You get shot down and you hear Falco go
"YOU SUCK FOX! YOUR DAD CAN DO BETTER THEN THAT AND HE'S DEAD!"
YOU SEE LUKE SKYWALKER SHOOT YOU DOWN
and you hear him say "whoops, finger slipped" or "Well what was I suppose to do? I thought he was Darth Vader!"
THE DEATH STAR SHOOTS YOU DOWN
Darth Vader shoots you down
Pepy makes you bukkle your seatbelt.
You hear Wolf go "when will the hurting stop?"
and you see him cry too!
You hear Wolf go "woes me"
"It's not fair! I always get shot down"
"WAIT pit stop time!"
...when you go to a fancy restraunt and they serve frog legs, you scream out, "Nooooo.....!"
...when one of the characters die, you bury your game pak and buy a new one.
...you suck helium to impersonate Slippy.
...you think our sun is Solar.
...your N64 blew up just now from overload of playing too much.
...you came here to see if you qualified of being a "Starfox Freak Fan".
...you go to your rabbit for advice(but instead, it craps).
...you think Saddam is Andross in disguise trying to rule the world.
...when you see the sign "U-Turn", you try to flip your car.
Falco: Hey, Einstein, that's a
tricycle! Try again,
Mr. Wizard!
Pepper: Oops...
Have you ever noticed that on some stages, you could
be going straight
the whole time and then 'WHAM!'... One of your wingmen crash into
you.
They start yelling at you as if you were the one swirving. I bet
the
reason they don't answer you when you yell back at the screen is
because
they know that it was their fault and they tried to dump it on
you...
...you don't know who Fox McCloud is.
...you think Peppy Hare is a shampoo.
...you think ROB 64 is a new game.
...someone asks you what an arwing is you say, "I'm not sure, I've only flown the air vehile in Star Fox64.
...you think Slippy Toad is a girl.
...you think Slippy Toad is the man in the basement on Super Mario 64.
...you think the Landmaster is a new fitness machine.
...you go to the sports store to ask for one (see above).
...you don't even know what Star Fox is!!!!!!!!! That's very scary. If this refers to you, then GO AWAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
...you try to put Star Fox 64 in a Playstation (noooo)!!!!!!!!
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.. you've defended Star Wolf's view of cast.
...you know the Star Wolf team's last names (I know 'em)
...Pigma is somehow the winner of this month's poll.
...you think "Uncle Andross!" is a dramatic and emotional quote.
...you've figured out how Andross could've comquered the Lylat system.
...somehow the train engineer win's this month's poll.
...you've named your computer ROB 64 and have programmed it to say different quotes from Star Fox 64.
...you cry when Star Wolf get's shot down.
...you cry when ANYONE get's shot down.
...you've beaten both diffuculties on every route BLINDFOLDED.
...you talk back to the screen when someone sends a transmittion.
...you start talking like Peppy. "Use bombs wisely." "Use the brakes!" "Use the boost to get through!"
...you start talking like Falco to your parents. "You cleaned yourroom!" "I guess YOU should be thankful."
...you wonder why the Cornerian army is so useless.
...you know why Katt and Falco know each other!=O)
...you move to Aquas for the scenery.
...when your friends tell you to stop saying, "hey, what's the big idea?"
...your convinced that Katina is a good place to visit but you'd never want to live there.
...if you've ever defended Slippy's voice.
...Nintendo limits you to 2 calls a day about a rumored "Star Fox 64 sequel".
...if you've ever tried to modify the rumble pak.
...you know the voice actor's names.
...if you've ever wrote Nintendo a letter concerning Cornerian government's political views.
...your convinced that Star Fox influenced Star Wars.
You stare at a blank T.V. screen for hours to intercept
a message from
Andross.
You make an aluminum version of Fox's communicator.
You carry a helium tank around so you can do bad impressions of Slippy.
You fall in love with Falco or Kat.
You want to get your driver's license so you can drive
a Landmaster.
Q:What did Falco say to Slippy?
A: Stop hopping and get that "fly"!
10. Peppy: "Fox! Are You Going To Listen To Me Or NOT?"
9. Fox: "Geez Slippy! I Told you to fix That Helium Leak in your Arwing!"
8. Fox: "For A Ghost, you sure Talk A Lot, Father."
7. Falco: "I'm Lombardi. Falco Lombardi"
6. Peppy: "Use The Force, Fox!"
5. Andross: "Join Me, StarFox, and you'll never go hungry AGAIN!"
4. Katt: "Falco, you're telling me you already forgot about last night?"
3. Fox: "Hey, ROB! They have a laser on Great Fox For A REASON, you know."
2. Andrew: "BEEFCAKE! BEEFCAKE!!"
1. Slippy: "FOX! I have to go to the Bathroom, REAL REAL BAD!